Surviving Holiday Breakups by Expert Divorce Attorney Brian Thompson

The holiday season can be a difficult time for those in relationships that are teetering on the edge and especially difficult for those whose relationship ends just prior to the holidays.  What can you do to get over the sadness, depression or other feelings that frequently go along with the end of a relationship?

1. Spend time with friends and family – The end of a relationship is simply a reflection of how you feel about and interact with that partner. It does not have to be taken as a reflection of your personal worth.  No matter what went down between you and your partner, chances are your friends and family (even the prying ones) still love you.  Remember that and enjoy some time with friends and family.

2. Attend holiday parties – Continue to enjoy your favorite holiday traditions and parties. If you like to dress up, drink and/or dance at holiday parties, go ahead and do so.  Who knows?  You may just meet your next boyfriend or girlfriend at the bar, on the dance floor or under the mistletoe.  Just don’t throw yourself into a rebound relationship before you have processed your feelings from the prior relationship.

3. Avoid your ex-partner – Try to avoid places where you might encounter your ex, such as parties thrown by mutual friends.  Delete him or her from your phone to avoid the temptation to drunk dial your ex.  Also, lay low on social media – don’t post photos of yourself with some new person you met just to piss off your ex.  This kind of passive-aggressive behavior is childish and just keeps your mind occupied with the ex-partner.  Consider “unfriending” or “unfollowing” your ex on social media so that you don’t see pictures of him or her that cause you to dwell on the relationship.

4. Volunteer and/or donate – Volunteering to help others can take your focus off your problems, both real and perceived, and help create connection to your fellow man and community in which you live. Consider volunteering to serve meals to the needy in a soup kitchen, deliver meals to the elderly, or spend time with the elderly in a retirement community.  Consider donating to a toy drive the money you would have spent on your partner’s gift . . . he won’t miss the socks or tie you would have given him, but the child who receives your toy will be thankful.

Whatever approach or approaches you take to survive a holiday break, be thankful that a new year and new beginning is right around the corner.