What Romance Means in a Long-Term Relationship by blogger Casey

In the beginning of any new relationship, romance comes pretty easy. It’s dramatic, over-the-top, and exhilarating – a dozen red roses, a four-course dinner at a fancy restaurant, a walk in the park at dusk. This is the happy, ‘Honeymoon’ phase of a relationship where everything is blissfully perfect and you can’t imagine being without the other person for even a minute.

Speaking as someone who has spent plenty of time in the Honeymoon phase with relationships, it’s the step after this that gets harder. After spending enough time together, you begin to settle down and get comfortable with each other, and all of these earlier ‘romantic’ gestures become less frequent and lose their necessity altogether. This is the time when things become real.

Once you’ve reached this real part of the relationship, the word ‘romance’ begins to take on a different meaning altogether – what I would argue is the true meaning of the word. Romance is not really about grand, over-the-top gestures anymore. Instead, it’s about a million small, tiny actions and words that occur every day in normal life. You no longer need the proof of these earlier gestures to feel secure in the relationship; the relationship just is.

Romance now becomes about understanding and loving the other person completely; not despite their flaws, but because of them. It’s seeing the other person for who they truly are, and choosing to be with them every day because they make you feel safe, comfortable, and happier than you are by yourself. It’s about living your life and being yourself with someone beside you.